Your Morning Metal (Persecutor)

At the edge of metal and the new sonic wave came Floater. I dare you to find another band so goddamn cool.

I am of alien intelligence, at least they say so. I could show you anything unless I want to. Many people run away from me; I make them angry. They don’t like the way I shake, I am reminded. Oh, I am reminded. Stop and take a look at where your words are falling. Listen to where your wisdom goes. Oh, you might be disappointed at just how much your victim knows. You better kick in. Oh, I am sickened. Oh, you won’t listen. Little girl has learned a lesson today, she has a value. Get up and change the sheets again; late night with Gallo. Many people run away from her, she makes them angry. They don’t like the way she moves, she is reminding. Oh, she is reminding. Did you wake up today? Did you wake up yesterday? Did you wake up today? And will you wake up tomorrow? It came up from the water, down into the village, now. Followed me to my home, and spoke to me and said: Don’t worry, ’cause this is only meant to be just like a warning to you from me, and I am only meant to be affectionate.

―Floater, “Persecutor” (1995)

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Your Morning Metal (Future Tense)

The caricatures of the past have a way of haunting reality in the present. This is, of course, a familiar point we have considered before, and even in a metallic context. But, really, take a moment to appreciate that the song is over a quarter-century old. Yeah, really.

What do you see on the news when you watch TV? War in the name of God, or a playground killing spree. Politicians promise you the world, and a preacher cries; all he ever wanted was your money, and a bitch on the side. What went wrong? Did society twist him?” What do you see in the center of the public eye? Rock stars on smack, and a serial killer fries. Radicals blame suicide and murder on our form of art; brainwash the youth, you know they claim we all play a part. What a shame that they can’t think for themselves. Past tense to future tense, let history unfold. So ends a decade, now, what will the nineties hold? You know we’re verging on the edge of an age; then another century will turn the page. What do you think they will say when they look back on this? Were the eighties just a time of spoiled innocence? We leave our legacy like dust in the sands of time. Let us hope the seeds we plant can carry the weight of our crimes. Past tense to future tense, let history unfold. And when we’re old and gray, these stories will be told. You know we’re verging on the edge of an age; then another century will turn the page. We sail on an ocean, a sea of doubt. Skeptics make no sense, can’t work things out. I’ll choose optimism, scream its name; look to the future, a burning flame. Past tense to future tense, let history unfold. So ends a decade, now, what will the nineties hold? You know we’re verging on the edge of an age; then another century will turn the page. Turn the page.

―Sanctuary, “Future Tense” (1989)

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Weekend Metal (Beneath the Wheel)

Yeah, it’s just one of those songs. Absolutely … perfect.

Beneath the wheel! Go! Don’t be late! First one out of the starting gate! Run! Be on time! First one to cross the finish line! Swim ahead of the school; if you have to, cheat! If you never slow down you’ll never be beat! If you lose in life it’s because you lagged! Keep up with the traffic or you’ll get dragged down beneath the wheel! Go! Don’t be tardy! Fell asleep last night at a party! Run! Make the grade! School’s a job! You don’t get paid! Run at the head of the pack, be the leader in this race! Stay up front Just in case! If you lose in life it’s because you lagged! Keep up with the traffic or you’ll get dragged down beneath the wheel! Don’t play child’s games, they’re just a waste of mind! Study every night or you might fall behind! Dragged down beneath the wheel! Stop! You can’t win! But you can always catch up in the end!

―D.R.I., “Beneath the Wheel” (1989)

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Your Morning Followup (Metal Bug Edition)

(ahem!) Testing, testing … is this thing on? Um … ah … okay. Er … so, right. This seems like a followup apropos Your Morning Metal, but in truth it isn’t really what it looks like. Never mind.

Your Morning Metal (Welcome to Hell)

The first black metal album, or so it is said. Of course, Venom followed Welcome to Hell with an album actually called Black Metal, so why not? This is the sort of thing that thrilled a generation precisely because it made the self-righteous murmur and fret.

Fight! We will fight right. Living low in a world of our own, destined to live right, fight. We’re taking Hell as our home; burning lives burning, asking me for the mercy of God. Ancient cries crying, acting fast upon the way of the dog. Welcome to Hell! Kill! We will kill death. Masturbating on the deeds we have done, Hell commands, “Death! Kill!” Argue not or feel the death of the sun. Burning lives burning, asking me for the mercy of God. Ancient cries crying, acting fast upon the way of the dog. Welcome to Hell! Leave your souls at His Feet. Kiss the flames, scorn defeat. Die! We won’t die! Live! Our choice of difference is what you’ll never know. Mortal voids live, die, buried deep beneath the fall of the snow. Burning lives burning, asking me for the mercy of God. Ancient cries crying, acting fast upon the way of the dog. Welcome to Hell!

―Venom, “Welcome to Hell” (1981)

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Your Morning Metal (The Explorer)

Shotgun Messiah, like most of the glam rage of the late eighties, was one of those specialized things. They caught you with a pop hook here or there, and, you know, whatever. But among other things, Shotgun Messiah had Harry K. Cody, and, well, that brings us to “The Explorer”.

Your Morning Metal (Male Supremacy)

Look, this has always been hilarious more than anything else. I can actually give a nod to Tipper Gore herself for pointing the way to Carnivore, a band, as you might imagine, that horrified the moralists.

―Carnivore, “Male Supremacy” (1985)

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Your Morning Metal (Beer Bong)

TURD: Oh, come on, do you really need the unfortunately requisite disclaimer about binge drinking?

Beer bong! suck it down! Beer bong! don’t do it wrong! Beer bong! don’t take too long, or else you’ll down! Beer bong! gulp it down! Beer bong! if you can! Beer bong! make it vanish if you’re a man! Heidelberg! Dutch Treat! Black Label! Beer bong! it’s very clear! Beer bong! you must be daring! Beer bong! or else the beer you’ll be wearing! Beer bong! and tomorrow―Beer bong! when I wake―Beer bong!―to my sorrow, my head will ache! Meister Brau! Blatz! Grain Belt! Old Milwaukee! Pearl! Shaeffer!​

―Atrophy, “Beer Bong” (1988)

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Your Morning Metal (The Lonely Ones)

Rally up! There’s a lot goin’ on.

Pain is the cross we bear, sentenced to life because we dare to ask why things ain’t fair. We’ll take our share of pain, hide our scars, pretend we’re sane. ‘Cause ain’t it all a game? And in the end it’s the memories that remain. Out in the wild we’re stronger. The more they’re right we’re wronger. There comes a time to walk away, when our night becomes your day. We are the lonely ones, lost alone and gone astray. We are the guilty ones, exiled, and sentenced far away. So, since we have the name, maybe we’ll play this little game. But we won’t feel no shame; we’ll fight this fight alone as our feelings turn to stone. We’re callous to the bone; it’s the only way to survive this danger zone. Out here you got to be stronger. Out here you’re right when you’re wronger. And if you fight and live to tell, you’ll fight again this life in Hell. We are the lonely ones, lost alone and gone astray. We are the guilty ones, exiled, and sentenced far away.

―Widowmaker, “The Lonely Ones” (1992)

Your Morning Metal (Tea)

Or, you know, your morning coffee. Or wait until later this afternoon. Or … or .... Look, I got nothin’. My bad jokes aren’t even good this morning. But something about the guitars goes here.

On the following Friday as I turned out the light, Grandma came and knocked at my door. “Wake up King, wake up my dear. I am gonna show you about the House of Amon.” Oh, it is time for tea; it is time again. “Even your mother is present; we made her sleep in my rocking chair.” At first I felt really scared, but there was no reason to, as I saw the knife sneaking out from Grandmother’s dress. Then it cut a tiny wound in my mother’s little hand. Oh, it is time for tea; it is time again. Blood was running into the teapot, then I heard Them laugh. “A bit of this in a cup of tea is what it takes to set Them free. You will hear Them telling stories from far beyond this Earth.” What I saw and what I heard made me want to stay and learn. I really hope this dream will never end. It’s hard to describe the kind of feeling that went on in my mind―a Paradise. Hearing Their stories and feeling Their warmth, we laughed with tears in our eyes. From the first cup of tea to the last drop of blood, nothing seemed to matter at all anymore. My mother? She didn’t exist, to me. Oh, I felt so heavenly. Oh, it is time for tea; it is time again.

―King Diamond