Detail: "Texas Gov. Rick Perry announces a special session, Saturday, June 18, 2005, in Austin, Texas. Perry on Saturday vetoed the state's $35.3 billion public education budget and called lawmakers back to the Capitol to finally find a solution to the school finance dilemma. (AP Photo/ Thomas Terry)"

Rick … effing … Perry.

Says a lot about Texas, doesn’t he? After all, Texans elected him.

As Gov. Rick Perry addressed business leaders in New Hampshire last Friday, he was asked about the two-count felony indictment he’s facing back home.

His answer, according to ABC News: “I’ve been indicted by that same body now for I think two counts, one of bribery, which I’m not a lawyer, so I don’t really understand the details here.”

Bribery? Really? ….

…. Two charges, yes. But no bribery charge.

Let us be clear about what Mike Ward of the Houston Chronicle describes as possibly “another Perry ‘oops’ moment”: The Governor of Texas, indicted on two counts, accusing Democratic politicking of the Republican prosecutor who presented the case and the Republican-appointed judge who oversaw the grand jury hearing, mugging for his mugshot, and denigrating his own citizens as Democrats, apparently has no idea what he has actually been indicted for.

Or perhaps he is simply miscalculating, much like he did when he decided he could win the Republican nomination and then set about trying in one of the most humiliating, difficult to watch campaigns in history, the impact of which was softened by the fact that he was jockeying for position with Newt Gingrich, Rick Santorum, Michele Bachmann, and Herman Cain. It really was a menagerie of political pornography, the sort of thing we are often ashamed to admit that we watched; a wash of ineptitude that left us feeling dirty and exploitative for having sat there and painfully endured.

And the miscalculation would be simple enough to project: Gov. Perry would seem to think there is no way he can be convicted, so he’s not taking any of this seriously in the public eye. The only problem there is that he might well find himself convicted, and at that point the court will look very poorly, very sternly, upon his denigration of the justice system and judicial processes. It could, in fact, mean the difference between minimum and maximum sentences.

Then again, this is Texas, where the magnitude of Governor Perry’s stupidity seems to be some sort of badge of honor.


Ward, Mike. “Another Perry ‘oops’ moment?” Texas Politics. 27 August 2014.

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