widget

A Note on Why the Internet Goes to Hell When It Dies

[#nevermind]

Did you Know? In 2009, Eminem tweeted proof that he scored 465,800 in Donkey Kong, making him one of the highest scorers in the world. [via Salon.com, 11 November 2017]The Internet—(no, I do not like Capitalizing the Word)—sees fit to inform me that—

In 2009, Eminem tweeted proof that he scored 465,800 in Donkey Kong, making him one of the highest scorers in the world.

(via Salon.com; #nevermind)

—and no, it is true I did not know this before; nor is it clear how I should feel about this information. No, seriously, other than the fact that some editor somewhere saw fit to include a trivial widget to tell me stuff like this, I had precisely no reason to care.

Meanwhile, something, something, and now for something completely different.   

Hey, how about this: If I blame Tom Clancy, how fucking smart are you?

Comic Relief (Facebook Feeley Mix)

Facebook trending widget, 13 May 2015, 19:55 PDT: "A.J. Feeley: Former NFL Quarterback Says Tom Brady Used Broken-In Balls in 2004 Game"A world without copy editors.

Or, rather, a world without copy editors who aren’t utterly demoralized for being reduced to redline spotters.

It doesn’t matter that they turned the greenlines off; greenlines don’t see Freudian ghosts everywhere.

Ah, Facebook!

And, you know, given that the company has unethically screwed with users before in the name of some twisted assertion of social science, we would not blame those who wonder if maybe this isn’t deliberate. You know, two really depressing notes, and then Feeley on Brady’s balls being broken-in.

____________________

Image note: Facebook trending widget, 13 May 2015, 19:55 PDT:

A. J. Feeley: Former NFL Quarterback Says Tom Brady Used Broken-In Balls in 2004 Game”

Literacy in the Time of Facebook

This is what it comes to.

Either Empire viewers are really, really stupid, or Facebook is.  Flip a coin.One of the underappreciated qualities of whatever excrement happens to be “trending” via social media is that we can discern a little something or other about the audience. You know, like a “Most Popular” sidebar in which we discover that for everything else going on, people would rather read about Rhianna going on vaction, or Jennifer Lawrence nude, or, hey, how about Martha Stewart having a threesome.

This is what we do with literacy.

I suppose, then, that while it is easy enough to say we shouldn’t be surprised that the season finale of a popular television series is trending, I’m not certain why the trending aspect is the fact that a finale is a two-hour episode.

But, you know, it’s Facebook, so … right.

Yeah. This is what we do with literacy.

____________________

Image note: Facebook “trending” widget, 19 March 2015, 1:49 PDT. Apparently people who didn’t watch the show need to know how long it was. Wait a minute, that doesn’t work, does it? Why would we care? Oh, dear. That means either Empire viewers are really, really stupid, or Facebook is. Flip a coin.

The Less Than Serious Post About Mutant Monkeys

Facebook trending widget, 19 February 2015, 23:40 PST.Yes, mutant monkeys.

Actually, we might take the moment to simply chuckle at the idea. After all, it’s for a good cause, not some supervillain idea that involves friggin’ laser beams coming from their friggin’ heads.

What you’re looking at is familiar enough, though. It is that Facebook sidebar widget, and this is the news it brought on 19 February 2015, around 23:40 PST.

We’ll try to be serious about the content … er … um … later.

For now, just enjoy the prospect that mutant monkeys will save us all.

Mika and the Furries

Mika Brzezinski: 'Morning Joe' host loses composure, runs off camera during segment on 'furries'. (via Facebook, 9 December 2014)Sometimes, you don’t need to see the video. Nor do you really want the story detail.

That is to say, every now and then the capsule summary does just fine.

____________________

Image note: Detail of Facebook sidebar “Trending” widget, 9 December 2014, 1:08 AM PST.