self-gratification

The Moralist, the Moralizing, and the Moral of the Story

Fight: Mikasa awakens ― Detail of frame from Attack on Titan episode 6, 'The World the Girl Saw: The Struggle for Trost, Part 2'.

There is no moral to the story; it is convenient word play in an age of professional moralists and societal resentment toward morals of stories.

A personal moment: Something strange occurred by which a blog accustomed to calling thirty hits an outstanding day pulled about sixty for two in a row. The phenomenon on this occasion is one of a scant few posts written directly about the infamous former FOX News personality Bill O’Reilly, on an occasion he appeared to throw his own mother under the bus.

One of those weird curses of privilege: Since people are reading it, do I deliberately write a follow-up? Great, who wants to read that much of me crowing about the demise of Bill O’Reilly’s tenure at FOX News? And can I really muster the will to wallow in such sordid tales when it means putting Bill O’Reilly’s face on a protracted discussion of sexual harassment and belligerence? And how much should I really complain about the world when this is the question I’m nibbling through lunch time?

Maybe it’s these conundra, even more than the low ethics, that we come to disdain about conservatives. I can still remember a Doonesbury episode from the Time of the Blue Dress, and the idea that Mike was relieved that his twelve year-old daughter already understood enough about fellatio that he need not explain that aspect of the headlines. The idea of putting Bill O’Reilly‘s face on any discussion of sexual harassment almost feels like harassing belligerence of its own.

To the other, it is not so much a question of passing on opportunity; rather, well, damn it, the smartest thing to do would be to stop now.

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Empowerment (Jumping for Jesus)

Via The Hill:

A letter distributed in the St. Johns neighborhood of Portland, Oregon, over the weekend asked the state’s Democratic Sen. Jeff Merkley to jump off a bridge for Jesus.

According to Portland CBS affiliate KOIN 6 News, the letter asks God to “help Jeff Merkley walk over the Fremont Bridge and jump off into the Willamette River on Christmas Eve.”

“Let there be wine & song,” the letter read. “Every kind of food & drink; let toasts be made and laughter & hugs.”

It seems worth reminding the cultivation of two decades worth of conservative lulzbaiting, even before the days of lulz and roses. That is to say, there really isn’t any point to being outraged, which in turn is like allowing ourselves to actually feel terrorized and thereby accomplishing the terrorist’s goal. In this case, the point is to offend. But this is not pointed offense; this isn’t making any coherent statement. This is essentially cruelty and offense for the sake of self-gratification.

Christians, though. Yeah. Good luck with that. They’re in your churches; they always have been. This isn’t something out there, happening to someone else. This is really happening.

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Garcia, Eric. “Letter to Merkley Asks Him to Jump Off Bridge for Jesus”. Roll Call. 21 November 2016.

Inspired

Detail of illustration by Raf Salazar for ReGrBl, 14 February 2015.

We must apologize.

For reasons pertaining to and derived from the general sloth of any given weekend, as well as our general disdain toward Valentine’s Day, we missed a perfect opportunity to voice our solidarity with all the other wankers out there who don’t appreciate the annual reminder that we are defined according to who we are partnered with.

As such, we missed the opportunity to make a bad pun about respawning with Valerie.

Or to hum along with nostalgia:

I’ll tell you now, and I won’t tell you twice, where when and how I got some bad advice. I never thought I could handle a girl with guns. And let me tell you, you can bet that I’m not the only one.

Or, rather, just because someone gave us an excuse: Ladies and gentelemen, Tommy Shaw:

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Salazar, Raf. “Happy Valentine’s Day”. ReGrBl. 14 December 2015.

Something You Shouldn’t Read at Work

N....S....F....WOkay, look, middle age is what it is. And with many things, it really is true that it’s not how old you are but how not old you feel.

And, yet …

… I must be getting old, despite refusing to grow up.

I mean, I’m pretty sure Erika Moen’s flip-hole cartoon is genuinely funny, but … why am I not laughing?

I mean, really, even the gratuitous New Hope joke just isn’t moving me the way it should.

I’m guessing there is a matter of perspective involved that I’m just missing. Like Wooderson raving about his car. That is, if you don’t get the underlying trope, you won’t understand why the joke is funny.

Still, though, we cannot forget the tireless dedication of our comic artists. The amount of thought and effort that goes into a joke like that is both incalculable and just a bit scary.

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TURD: NSFW.