A Memo to the Guardians of Female Chastity and Other Assorted Pervert Prudes

MEMORANDUM

To: Guardians of Female Chastity and other assorted Pervert Prudes

re: Ride stops at the elbow

Ye Guardians of Female Chastity―

My entire life, I’ve been told to fear you in one way or another. I’ve been told to cover my body as to not distract you in school, to cover my body to help avoid unwanted advances or comments, to cover my body as to not tempt you to sexually assault me, to reject your unwanted advances politely as to not anger you. I’ve been taught to never walk alone at night, to hold my keys in my fist while walking in parking lots, to check the backseat of my car, to not drink too much because you might take advantage of me. I’ve been told what I should and shouldn’t do with my body as to not jeopardize my relationships with you.

I’ve been warned not to emasculate you, to let “boys be boys,” to protect your fragile ego and to not tread on your even more fragile masculinity. I’ve been taught to keep my emotions in check, to let you be the unit of measure for how much emotion is appropriate and to adjust my emotions accordingly. I’ve been taught that you’re allowed to categorize women into mothers/sisters/girlfriends/wives/daughters but any woman outside of your protected categories is fair game.

So to those of you who think you’re being helpful by “protecting” me and my fellow women, you’re like a shark sitting in the lifeguard chair. I wasn’t uncomfortable until you showed up at the pool and the only potential predator I see is you.

Your mothers, sisters, girlfriends, wives and daughters don’t need you to walk them to the bathroom for safety.

(Rose-Hodge)

―it is time to go fuck yourselves.

Fabulous

“Now that we can get married and queer people having children is becoming more and more accepted, it seems we’ve forgotten that sexual liberation has always been, in my mind at least, a cornerstone of queer liberation. And it seems some queers think we’ve just been having all of this sex and pushing back against all of these sexual boundaries for all of these years as just another way to pass the time until we could become just like straight people. Like, ‘Hmm. We can’t get married yet. What should we do in the meantime? Needlepoint? Nah. Competitive baking? No. Oh, I’ve got it! Let’s get off!'”

―Noah Michelson

Y’know … he’s not wrong.

____________________

Michelson, Noah. “I’m A Gay Man Who Loves Sex (And Here’s Why That’s Suddenly A Problem)”. The Huffington Post. 13 August 2015.

Jonjak’s Magnificient Natural Whore Revue

You know how every once in a while, someone for some reason decides to remind you that this or that isn’t natural? You know, gay sex, a man wearing a skirt, women with unshaved legs and no man on top of her … yeah. Anyway:

Female bottlenose dolphins use their snouts as dildos on other females. These activities don’t always coincide with a low availability of males, but no surprises there. Apparently when the ladies are bored and desperate to get off, terms such as “motherhood fantasies” or “lifelong commitment” mean absolutely nothing to them.

So if I tell you that Marti Jonjak’s article for The Stranger, on “Whores of the Animal Kingdom” only goes downhill from there, well, right.

Then again, that’s probably what makes it worth reading, and why you should keep the link at hand to deliver unto the next person ejaculating that stuff about what is and isn’t “natural”.

____________________

Jonjak, Marti. “Whores of the Animal Kingdom”. The Stranger. 11 February 2015.

Just One of Those Things

There is little in the way of preface that could adequately frame the spectacle. Though for some, Debbie Harry’s “self sacrifice” apparently seemed a horrifying endorsement of sexual violence. As J. J. Anisiobi explains:

Dressed in a floor-length red dress and with her trademark blonde hair Debbie took centre stage at the Museum Of Contemporary Art Gala and both shocked and disgusted attendees.

As the 66-year-old singer stood with all eyes on her, two life-size nude statues of herself and co-curator Marina Abramovic were rolled onto the stage.

With almost magician-like precision Harry produced a large machete and as the crowd of celebrities began to cheer she plunged the knife straight into the heart of her naked double.

Some members of the MoCA audience chanted, “Violence against women!” in protest of the the faux brutality. One person in attendance described the show as “appalling”. Perhaps most damning, Dita von Teese, who has made a career out of exploiting female sexuality, invoked the famous comic strip Pogo, tweeting that, “This must be art, because it sure ain’t entertainment”.