There is, of course, the obvious question: Do you really want to know?
Setting that aside, it ought to be easy enough to recall an issue from the War of the Sexes, the question of what would happen if men were pregnant. Nor does it seem extraordinary to suggest that, for the most part, the answer usually orbits propositions about how men can’t deal with pain, or couldn’t endure forty weeks of the daily trials of pregnancy.
We ought not contest that.
Nonetheless, wonderful neighbors who happen to be female, it is time for the mansplanation, or, in this case, the bugsplanation, courtesy of our dude Adam.
Oh, come on, baby. You need this. I know you want to. You know it’s worth it. Just the click. I wouldn’t ever hurt you. You know that. And I promise it won’t c― … er … ah … right.
Adam! Adam! he’s our man! If he can’t man-splain, no one can!
(Oh, come on, dude, you knew that one would come, and quickly.)
Image note: Detail of Bug Martini by Adam Huber, 27 January 2016.