blame Adam

Bugularity (Morbid Cookie Gravity DynaMix)

#BugMartini | #blameAdam

Triptych detail of Bug Martini by Adam Huber, 27 June 2018.Something about mope and faith, or Mopey the Morbid Angel, at which point we find ourselves obliged to reckon with Cookie Monster, and then the Universe collapses into the gravity of this nexus of cascading invocation and eternity; a bug in the system stacks to overflow, accretes to singularity. Blame Adam when it all comes whimpering to a pathetic end.

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Image note: Triptych detail of Bug Martini by Adam Huber, 27 June 2018.

Divinely Buggy Infamy

#blameAdam | #thehashtag

Detail of Bug Martini, by Adam Huber, 23 May 2018.If trying to explain everything amiss, askew, or awry about this panel seems an agonizing prospect, we can most certainly blame Adam.

Any other day I might have gone with panel two, but something about this makes me wonder at the four-panel comic strip version of The Aristocrats.

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Image note: Detail of Bug Martini, by Adam Huber, 23 May 2018.

A Picture of Two Bugs in a Bathroom

#parenting | #blameAdam

Detail of Bug Martini, by Adam Huber, 21 May 2018.Yes, this is filed under Parenting.

No, this is not a mistake.

Yes, you may blame Adam, because that’s just how it goes.

And of course you want to know; that, too, is just how it goes.

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Image note: Detail of Bug Martini, by Adam Huber, 21 May 2018.

Nutty Buggery. Buggy Nuttery. Whatever.

[#bugnuts]

'They Really Dropped the Balls' - Detail of Bug Martini, by Adam Huber, 29 April 2018.Should occasion arise to suggest Eight Dollar Testicle is not #MyNextBandName, well, of course we can blame Adam. Kind of like Venkman and Jell-O, that way; there is always room to blame Adam. The eternal question, of course, is do bugs have nuts.

No, it isn’t.

Rule of thumb: When blaming Adam, the eternal question is whether you really, really want to know.

Of course you do.

And, Bugnuts. Now there’s a band name.

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Image note: Detail of Bug Martini, by Adam Huber, 29 April 2018.

Not an Epitaph

He was just a mute! (Detail of Bug Martini, by Adam Huber, 21 February 2018.It isn’t an epitaph.

Look, any number of jokes go here, like the second panel and how the one bug with the axe needs to be named Ed because something goes here about thirty years.

Still, though, the fourth panel is a killer. No, really, file under, “Holy shit!” and blame Adam.

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Image note: Detail of Bug Martini by Adam Huber, 21 February 2018.

What Bugs a Sith Lord (When Nature Strikes Back)

When history looks back on this period of American thought and communication, we might from our present vantage in that past to be wonder how prominently will stand out the question not of re-definition, but, rather, de-definition. Once upon a time it was enough to simply mutter and growl that transition is a noun. Detail of Bug Martini by Adam Huber, 8 March 2017. Meanwhile, pretty much any noun in the language can now be converted to a verb; simply apply the gerund form to mean, approximately, “using the [noun] as the [noun] is to be used”.

This makes sense in some cases; ’tis true enough that some words simply were as such when they arrived in our knowledge. There is a Fulghum joke in that, but it’s a regional thing, or it would be except nobody really cares. But it is, in fact true. We saw with a saw, for instance, and that is simply how the word arrived in our lifetimes.

Robert Newton Peck once explained it is always a lasso and never a lariat; you lasso with a lasso, but do not lariat with a lariat. And maybe he was wrong, but the lesson stuck. American pedantry is a thoroughly internalized empiricism.

So it goes. For the moment it suffices to blame Adam.

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Image note: Detail of Bug Martini by Adam Huber, 8 March 2017.

Just a Distraction

Detail of 'Bug Martini' by Adam Huber, 8 April 2016.Ten days.

There. There’s your filler, right there.

I passed on this ten days ago because I didn’t feel like writing any filler material, and come on, just how many crappy jokes can I make about the Buttmobile?

And if you would be so kind, please don’t ask what made me recall the poop joke.

Besides, you wouldn’t believe. You wouldn’t believe.

But I still get to blame Adam.

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Image note: Detail of Bug Martini by Adam Huber, 8 April 2016.

Adam’s Fault (New Jack)

Detail of 'Bug Martini' by Adam Huber, 24 March 2016.Some days, the best you can do is a heap of clichés:

• I got nothin’.

• Do you really want to know?

• Blame Adam.

See what I mean? There are other jokes, of course, but this is a family blog.

Oh, wait. Not really. I mean, I wouldn’t preclude it outright, but neither is it difficult to imagine the complaints.

(more…)

The Panacea

Detail of 'Bug Martini' by Adam Huber, 28 December 2015.In truth, my advice is to not actually try to figure out just what it is you’re looking at. Better to just blame Adam, which in turn really ought to be a t-shirt slogan of its own.

No, really; imagine the possibilities. Blame Adam. There is not a bug in your martini that couldn’t be justified on a shirt alongside the obvious slogan.

Bad memory? Blame Adam. Fretting over Nazi bikini girls? Blame Adam. Gendertyping in the twenty-first century got you down? Or maybe Great-Grandpa’s ball gag? Blame Adam, though admittedly I didn’t for that latter, instead somehow finding that it had nothing at all to do with Adam. Oh, wait. Forgot to carry the two. No, wait again. Wrong joke. It was attraction that has nothing to with Adam. What? Oh, right. Gravity. Never mind. Adam has nothing to do with gravity.

Hmph. That’s still wrong.

Right. Blame Adam.

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Image note: Detail of Bug Martini by Adam Huber, 28 December 2015.

Way Too Much Effort for a Cheap Joke

Detail of 'Bug Martini' by Adam Huber, 30 November 2015.“That the words uttered by the brave Tazendra are not as grandiose and full of pomp as Kieron the Conqueror’s, ‘The sea has brought our salvation’, or Undauntra the First’s, ‘Let him who doubts the victory wrest the banner from my hand’, or Sethra Lavode’s, ‘I speak for the Mountain and the Mountain speaks for the Orb’, or Lord Kuinu’s, ‘By all the Lords of Judgment, it is proved at last’, or expressive of the elegant understatement of Tigarre’s famous, ‘Turn around, my lord; I am behind you’, or Deo’s, ‘Welcome, my lady, to my home’; still, they are what was said, and so our duty as historian places before us the necessity of laying them before the reader.”

―Paarfi of Roundwood

See what I did there?

Never mind. Paarfi does.

Adam doesn’t, but that’s not important. In fact, Adam is only important on this occasion because it’s his fault I thought of Tigarre at all; and maybe I should be at least somewhat distressed about the proposition that I have yet to figure if Tigarre is the historical figure or historian.

And, yes, I would feel really stupid if someone has done that bit before, but I would still blame Adam because it was either the Tigarre joke or Facebooking my sister-in-law.

Oh, and we can safely ignore Steven; he’s just a set piece and occasional washing-machine leveler.

You know. Ironic counterpoint. Subtext. Dark side of the moon flashing like a drive indicator.

A tangent to the contextual orbit ’round my head.

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Image note: Tigarre the Turtle? ― Detail of Bug Martini by Adam Huber, 30 November 2015.

Brust, Steven. “Official Biography”. The Dream Café. 5 November 2015.

Paarfi of Roundwood. “The Lord of Castle Black: Describing Certain Events Which Occurred Between the 247th Year of the Interregnum and the 1st Year of the Reign of Empress Zerika the Fourth”. The Viscount of Adrilankha, vol. 2. Adrilankha: Glorious Mountain, 179 NOR2.