The Turn of the Page (Marooned Fifth)

#PutiTrump | #WhatTheyVotedFor

Should we take a moment to recall, oh, not quite six months ago, the ledes made a pretty straightforward setup:

President Donald Trump sought to insert himself into congressional investigations on Russia on Wednesday, urging lawmakers to hear from one of his former advisers, Carter Page, to counter testimony by directors of the FBI and CIA.

(Chiacu)

† † †

President Donald Trump on Wednesday accused Democrats of resisting testimony from Carter Page, his former campaign adviser, because he “blows away” allegations they have made.

(Bennett)

And that really is a wasted setup, right? That is, since we already know the punch line:

Carter Page, a former foreign policy adviser to the Trump campaign, informed the Senate Intelligence Committee on Tuesday that he will not be cooperating with any requests to appear before the panel for its investigation into Russian meddling in the 2016 election and would plead the Fifth, according to a source familiar with the matter.

(Watkins)

#wellduh. Because of course he will.

No, really, come on. When your name is Carter Page, it’s that or accuse anti-Catholic conspiracy and blither about Maroon 5 because, you know, Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama.

There are probably worse ideas in the world, and the joke about how it’s so not my job to figure out what those are sounds great and all, but it seems unavoidable to note were it not for worse ideas, the unfortunate Mr. Page would not be tossing coins to decide between Maroon 5 or pleading the Fifth.

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Image note: Composite — Donald Trump: Detail of photo by Mark Peterson/Redux for msnbc; Carter Page: AP Photo; Puti-Toots: Artist unknown.

Bennett, John T. “Trump Says Democrats No Longer Want Carter Page’s Testimony”. Roll Call. 31 May 2017.

Chicau, Doina. “Trump blasts Russia probe, touts ex-adviser Page over FBI, CIA”. Reuters. 31 May 2017.

Schleifer, Theodore. “Carter Page cites Maroon 5 in letter to Justice Department”. CNN. 15 May 2017.

Schwarz, Jon. “Carter Page, at Center of Trump Russian Investigation, Writes Bizarre Letter to DOJ Blaming Hillary Clinton”. The Intercept. 15 February 2017.

Watkins, Ali. “Carter Page says he won’t testify before Senate Intelligence panel in Russia probe”. Politico. 10 October 2017.